Honolulu is a city but it is nothing like New York City in size, scope or attitude. If you what you want is the noise and hustle of NYC, move there because you will not find that in Honolulu. In fact, transplants to Hawai i often get something known as rock fever or island fever . You are not going to be taking any roadtrips anywhere, the only way off is by plane and to the west coast of the mainland it s a five hour flight.
AlohaHonolulu has lots of traffic and can drive you crazy, we also have lots of high rise buildings and tons of people (most of them are tourists though), these are the only similarities between NYC and Honolulu. If you are looking for a fast paced environment don t move to the islands. We are very laid back and time usually is a non-issue. We don t have the evening entertainment of a mainland metro area either. From how you described what you like, I don t think Honolulu is the city for you. Hope this helps. (10 yrs Honolulu experience)
The mentality is totally different. People are very mild so you may not cope with that. The only common ground they both have are strong family ties. That is what I found from living in both cities a long time ago.