Indoor Waterparks in the Midwest, Which is the best? -

I live in chicago and assume the best indoor park to go to would be located in the dells. I m willing to go to another location within a reasonable distance just as long as it s FREAKIN AWESOME for kids 4-12 and parents.. here is a list of my demands~* Good food that isn t way over pricedI * suite to accommodate 6 people w/ bedroom (so i can bang my wife)* I want an outdoor balcony so I can smoke (shut up, smoking is awesome)* Newly renovated rooms (new enough)* Booze (it will help)* Interesting surprises

*I have something you can munch on*I can accommodate- trust me*Smoking rocks*Newly shaved labe s (new enough)*Booze (it will help)*interesting suprizesI dunno about waterpark .. how does golden showers sound?

kalahari in the dells